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Wanderlust
1 min read
"Do you ever sit and wonder?"
I'm asked this all the time,
But how can you wonder while sitting?
How can one imagine while being still?
Wondering, you're wondering.
Yet still, you're still.
Because you see,
You haven't really wandered.
Wondering still,
Wanting to wander still.
Yet how can you wander while being still?
I'm asked this all the time,
But how can you wonder while sitting?
How can one imagine while being still?
Wondering, you're wondering.
Yet still, you're still.
Because you see,
You haven't really wandered.
Wondering still,
Wanting to wander still.
Yet how can you wander while being still?
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His Thoughts, Her Actions
1 min read
"All you are is a whore
All you do is cause me pain.
You don't love me.
You don't care.
You're a liar.
You're untrustworthy.
I won't leave you.
You won't lose me
I love you.
You're perfect."
His words and actions will be the death of me.
All you do is cause me pain.
You don't love me.
You don't care.
You're a liar.
You're untrustworthy.
I won't leave you.
You won't lose me
I love you.
You're perfect."
His words and actions will be the death of me.
He doesn't love her.
He doesn't care.
She's a "liar."
She's "untrustworthy".
He won't leave her.
She won't lose him.
He loves her.
He tells her she's perfect."
She cries, not sure what to believe.
She cries, not meaning to hurt him.
She's kept up all night, wondering how it came to be this way, what she could have done.
'He's better off happy.'
She thought.
'And I'm better off alone, so I can no longer hurt anyone.'
She cried.
Alone."
He doesn't care.
She's a "liar."
She's "untrustworthy".
He won't leave her.
She won't lose him.
He loves her.
He tells her she's perfect."
She cries, not sure what to believe.
She cries, not meaning to hurt him.
She's kept up all night, wondering how it came to be this way, what she could have done.
'He's better off happy.'
She thought.
'And I'm better off alone, so I can no longer hurt anyone.'
She cried.
Alone."
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I'll be Your Worst Enemy
6 min read
It was a starry night. I only point this out because well, I hadn't seen a lot of stars in my lifetime, and when I did It was usually pictures in book or on TV. You see, I couldn't go outside much in general, a majority of my life was spent lying in bed, making walking the halls every so often if I had the strength to. I sound really lazy, huh? It wasn't my choice though, I had to lie about all day. I thought I'd start gaining weight and lose what little figure I had, lose the light tan I had. Well, I was almost right. I did in fact lose my tan, I never had color in my cheeks, I looked like a ghost. Instead of gaining weight though, I started losing. I was your average 110 pound girl before lazing about all day. My weight went to around 88 pounds. This kind of scared me, but I could see how it happened considering I never had an appetite anymore and was constantly getting sick and losing whatever food I did manage to get down. The medicine and treatments could have also affected me, but not like I could stop taking it, I wanted to stay alive, I wanted to see more of the world, I wanted to see those beautiful stars for real every chance I could. I didn't get that chance though, taking all of that medicine, going through so much pain and suffering for no reason. That's not true. I got to be alive for the time I could, and when I died I died how I wanted.
My name is Elena Drake, I died at the age of fifteen of what turned out to be a fatal type of cancer called Osteosarcoma, which is a bone cancer. I lived a happy life, had a few friends along the way, I would say I was a quiet, yet loud around those who were close kind of person, and tended to get along with everyone. I remember a week or so after my 15th birthday, after getting my driving permit I started feeling weak and tired a lot. My mom had taken my into the doctor, and they suggested I go to a more professional doctor rather than a family doctor. This had never happened before so I thought it a bit odd and started feeling nervous. A couple days later after the referral was received by the new doctor, I went in, had multiple tests done, which really sucked because I couldn't stand needles. We went home after all the testing was done and about a week, probably less than that, my mom had gotten a call from the doctor. I remember sitting on the couch watching some cartoon while she was in the other room when the phone rang. She answered, shortly after I heard a crash and quickly went to see what had happened. She dropped a plate and it had shattered. I asked her what was wrong, her eyes glassy with tears, the tears soon falling down her cheeks, she held my hand and told me what the nurse had told her. Of course, my expression went grim, tears formed in my eyes. I hugged her, trying to comfort her the best I could. Everything after that was multiple hospital visits, and eventually, staying there and waiting.
I was waiting to leave, beat the poison in my body, fight it off, but I guess my body wasn't strong enough against the enemy, I had been defeated. Don't look at this as sad though, sure I didn't live to be a mother, get married, and all that, but I married a good life with my mom and brother. It was great while it lasted. Some people leave the earth sooner than others, some get to move on, others had unfinished business though. I met some of those people the day I died, I could feel them as I was lying in the field of lilies on a cold night, I could hear them crying, asking themselves why they had to leave so soon, then others were quiet, and smiling. Feeling my body go cold, the voices getting fuzzy, the only feeling that set in was numbness. My body slowly went numb and I said goodbye to the world. Next thing I knew I woke up in a favorite dream of mine. The dream was one I had when I was twelve, my brother and I had been playing pirates, then suddenly everything turned real and we were actual pirates on a ship. The amazement in our eyes when looking around, seeing the treasure, the real pirates, it was all so cool. Something started changing about the dream though, the ship turned into a raft and I was all alone. I just wondered the sea for a while, looking for anyone, then everything went white.
I was face to face with a being that didn't look human, their eyes were white, no pupils or veins, their skin was the same, but the veins stood out very clearly, they were a deep purple. The being looked sad as their eyes met with mine. They seemed to be in pain. Walking closer to them, the waters turned to glass, everything was bright. I knew who this was. This was my worst enemy, the one who had taken my life. I took their hand in mine and smiled. "It's okay" I told them, my eyes filling with tears. "I don't blame you for all this, so don't blame yourself. Life was great while it happened, just maybe, don't snuff out the lives of others you know?" After saying this, they started crying. Their tears were red, blood I'm guessing. They hugged me tightly, and all I could hear was screaming, it was so loud my ears began ringing as everything went dark.
I woke up.
My name is Elena Drake, I died at the age of fifteen of what turned out to be a fatal type of cancer called Osteosarcoma, which is a bone cancer. I lived a happy life, had a few friends along the way, I would say I was a quiet, yet loud around those who were close kind of person, and tended to get along with everyone. I remember a week or so after my 15th birthday, after getting my driving permit I started feeling weak and tired a lot. My mom had taken my into the doctor, and they suggested I go to a more professional doctor rather than a family doctor. This had never happened before so I thought it a bit odd and started feeling nervous. A couple days later after the referral was received by the new doctor, I went in, had multiple tests done, which really sucked because I couldn't stand needles. We went home after all the testing was done and about a week, probably less than that, my mom had gotten a call from the doctor. I remember sitting on the couch watching some cartoon while she was in the other room when the phone rang. She answered, shortly after I heard a crash and quickly went to see what had happened. She dropped a plate and it had shattered. I asked her what was wrong, her eyes glassy with tears, the tears soon falling down her cheeks, she held my hand and told me what the nurse had told her. Of course, my expression went grim, tears formed in my eyes. I hugged her, trying to comfort her the best I could. Everything after that was multiple hospital visits, and eventually, staying there and waiting.
I was waiting to leave, beat the poison in my body, fight it off, but I guess my body wasn't strong enough against the enemy, I had been defeated. Don't look at this as sad though, sure I didn't live to be a mother, get married, and all that, but I married a good life with my mom and brother. It was great while it lasted. Some people leave the earth sooner than others, some get to move on, others had unfinished business though. I met some of those people the day I died, I could feel them as I was lying in the field of lilies on a cold night, I could hear them crying, asking themselves why they had to leave so soon, then others were quiet, and smiling. Feeling my body go cold, the voices getting fuzzy, the only feeling that set in was numbness. My body slowly went numb and I said goodbye to the world. Next thing I knew I woke up in a favorite dream of mine. The dream was one I had when I was twelve, my brother and I had been playing pirates, then suddenly everything turned real and we were actual pirates on a ship. The amazement in our eyes when looking around, seeing the treasure, the real pirates, it was all so cool. Something started changing about the dream though, the ship turned into a raft and I was all alone. I just wondered the sea for a while, looking for anyone, then everything went white.
I was face to face with a being that didn't look human, their eyes were white, no pupils or veins, their skin was the same, but the veins stood out very clearly, they were a deep purple. The being looked sad as their eyes met with mine. They seemed to be in pain. Walking closer to them, the waters turned to glass, everything was bright. I knew who this was. This was my worst enemy, the one who had taken my life. I took their hand in mine and smiled. "It's okay" I told them, my eyes filling with tears. "I don't blame you for all this, so don't blame yourself. Life was great while it happened, just maybe, don't snuff out the lives of others you know?" After saying this, they started crying. Their tears were red, blood I'm guessing. They hugged me tightly, and all I could hear was screaming, it was so loud my ears began ringing as everything went dark.
I woke up.
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Numb Ri Gold
4 min read
-- tagged by: 
--
Rules
1) Choose one of your own characters (OC).
2) Make them answer the following questions.
3) Then tag three people.
4) Feel free to add some questions of your own.
Character used: Numb Gold ((forgot his last name oops))
1) What gender are you?
Male
2) What is your age?
Eighteen I believe
3) Do you want a hug?
That's a bit random
4) Do you have any bad habit?
Coffee
5) What is your favorite food?
Human flesh nah just kidding. Apples
6) What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?
Coffee
7) Have you killed anyone?
Perhaps. Want to find out?
9) Do you hate anyone?
*looks at Phantom* ((sAME AF))
10) Do you have any secrets?
Kind of
11) What is your favorite season?
Winter
12) Who is your best friend(s)?
Mia who I may..um.. like..a lot...
Anywho
13) What are your hobbies?
Sleeping
14) What is your favorite drink?
Coffee
15) When is your birthday?
November 1st
16) What age did you die?
Pretty sure I wouldn't be answering this if I weren't alive, but okay.
I was seventeen
17) Are you nice or mean?
I don't know.
18) Are you social or shy?
Neither
19) What do you think of your parents?
Well I single handedly killed them so.
My mom was a whore
Dad taught me how to stab people.
20) What's your weakness?
Love.
21) How long can you stay under water?
Awhile. Never timed myself
22) What do you on a regular daily basis?
ur mum fegit
Kidding, I wake up, get coffee, try and ignore everyone, try and talk to Mia, then sleep
23) Do you love someone?
Yep
24) When was the last time you wet yourself?
I don't fucking know.
25) What's your favorite band?
Motionless in White probably
26) Ever worn a dress?
once
27) Willingly?
I was drunk
28) What do you consider fun in the day-time?
Talking to the one I love
29) At night?
^
30) Ever kissed anyone?
Mhmm
31) ...Of the same gender?
mhmmm
32) It's clear you're gay.
"pfft yes sorry Numb i'm gay af according tot hem"
oH
guess my gay phase is back.
33) What's your favorite thing to touch?
The booty. Mia's boo-
Nill get the FUCK off my computer.
Even though you're not wrong
34) Anyone love you?
I don't know.
35) What's your favorite color?
Blue
36) When was the last time you cried?
Cant remember
37) Do you have a pet?
Used to, a small dragon
39) Are you crazy?
Kind of
40) What are you?
I don't even know, some kind of shifter?
41) What´s your nickname?
"Mia, since my real name is Maria, I also get called Bitch : D"
Please let me know who calls you a bitch so I can handle them.
I don't have one? No idea.
42) Do you consider yourself a happy or a down person?
Down
43) If you were a superhero, you'd be...?
Wolverine
44) Favorite movie?
Really liked The Mirror
45) What is your current occupation?
None?
46) Who do you know that bugs you?
Nill or Phantom ((S A M E AFFFFF))
47) What's your favorite song?
This
48) Do you consider yourself a warrior?
Not really, no.
50) Ever think about getting married?
Kind of
51) Have you ever had a sleepover with someone of the opposite sex?
Yep
53) Do you have any piercings anywhere?
Yeah, used to have a septum and one lip ring, I now have three on my left ear, four on my right.
All of which I did myself.
54) Favorite hang-out spot?
Under a tree at night
55) Where do you like to eat?
I don't really care
56) Do you like video games? If so, which ones?
Smash I guess
57) Favorite article of clothing?
Beanies
58) Favorite musical instrument?
Guitar
59) Final question. Who do you tag?
I tag: ur mum, ur mum, dEEz newts
--Rules
1) Choose one of your own characters (OC).
2) Make them answer the following questions.
3) Then tag three people.
4) Feel free to add some questions of your own.
Character used: Numb Gold ((forgot his last name oops))
1) What gender are you?
Male
2) What is your age?
Eighteen I believe
3) Do you want a hug?
That's a bit random
4) Do you have any bad habit?
Coffee
5) What is your favorite food?
Human flesh nah just kidding. Apples
6) What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?
Coffee
7) Have you killed anyone?
Perhaps. Want to find out?
9) Do you hate anyone?
*looks at Phantom* ((sAME AF))
10) Do you have any secrets?
Kind of
11) What is your favorite season?
Winter
12) Who is your best friend(s)?
Mia who I may..um.. like..a lot...
Anywho
13) What are your hobbies?
Sleeping
14) What is your favorite drink?
Coffee
15) When is your birthday?
November 1st
16) What age did you die?
Pretty sure I wouldn't be answering this if I weren't alive, but okay.
I was seventeen
17) Are you nice or mean?
I don't know.
18) Are you social or shy?
Neither
19) What do you think of your parents?
Well I single handedly killed them so.
My mom was a whore
Dad taught me how to stab people.
20) What's your weakness?
Love.
21) How long can you stay under water?
Awhile. Never timed myself
22) What do you on a regular daily basis?
ur mum fegit
Kidding, I wake up, get coffee, try and ignore everyone, try and talk to Mia, then sleep
23) Do you love someone?
Yep
24) When was the last time you wet yourself?
I don't fucking know.
25) What's your favorite band?
Motionless in White probably
26) Ever worn a dress?
once
27) Willingly?
I was drunk
28) What do you consider fun in the day-time?
Talking to the one I love
29) At night?
^
30) Ever kissed anyone?
Mhmm
31) ...Of the same gender?
mhmmm
32) It's clear you're gay.
"pfft yes sorry Numb i'm gay af according tot hem"
oH
guess my gay phase is back.
33) What's your favorite thing to touch?
The booty. Mia's boo-
Nill get the FUCK off my computer.
Even though you're not wrong
34) Anyone love you?
I don't know.
35) What's your favorite color?
Blue
36) When was the last time you cried?
Cant remember
37) Do you have a pet?
Used to, a small dragon
39) Are you crazy?
Kind of
40) What are you?
I don't even know, some kind of shifter?
41) What´s your nickname?
"Mia, since my real name is Maria, I also get called Bitch : D"
Please let me know who calls you a bitch so I can handle them.
I don't have one? No idea.
42) Do you consider yourself a happy or a down person?
Down
43) If you were a superhero, you'd be...?
Wolverine
44) Favorite movie?
Really liked The Mirror
45) What is your current occupation?
None?
46) Who do you know that bugs you?
Nill or Phantom ((S A M E AFFFFF))
47) What's your favorite song?
This
48) Do you consider yourself a warrior?
Not really, no.
50) Ever think about getting married?
Kind of
51) Have you ever had a sleepover with someone of the opposite sex?
Yep
53) Do you have any piercings anywhere?
Yeah, used to have a septum and one lip ring, I now have three on my left ear, four on my right.
All of which I did myself.
54) Favorite hang-out spot?
Under a tree at night
55) Where do you like to eat?
I don't really care
56) Do you like video games? If so, which ones?
Smash I guess
57) Favorite article of clothing?
Beanies
58) Favorite musical instrument?
Guitar
59) Final question. Who do you tag?
I tag: ur mum, ur mum, dEEz newts
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Le Marysue Test -Nill-
5 min read
[] They are possessed by an angel
[x] They are possessed by a demon
[] They are a werewolf/vampire/faerie
[] They are physically strong
[] They have a rare hair/fur colour
[x] Their eyes are an unusual colour
[x] This happens to be red
[] Their eye change colour
[] They have wings
[] They can grow extra body parts/shapeshift
[] They are immortal
[] (if a female) they have large bra size (Okay so any C cup and Up are Marysues everyone!!!)
[] (if a male) they are very muscular
[/] They are very attractive to the opposite gender
[] They are telekinetic/pyrokinetic/etc
[x] They have sixth sense/can mind-read/etc
[] They have an object of some sort that gives them powers
[] They have a special ability/power, but they don't know about it yet
[] They were bestowed/cursed with these powers
[] They are a healer
[x] They are from a very rich/royal family
[] They don't know that they are from a very rich/royal background
[x] They have lost one/both of their parents (ANYONE WHO HAS A DEAD PARENT IS A MARYSUE EVERYONE) ((his brother killed their parents oopsies))
[] They ran away from home
[] Their parents are cruel, uncaring, abusive etc
[x] They are part angel/demon/faerie/some other mythical creature
[] They never knew their parents
[] They were abused/spoiled as a child
[] They are very attractive to the same gender
[]They have lots of friends/no friends
[] They are emo or cutesy
[] They look much younger or older than they really are.
[?] They are currently in a relationship
[] They have lots of morals and state them a lot, for example: 'I would rather be with my friends than with my boyfriend/girlfriend' 'Nothing matters more to me than my friends/family' 'I wouldn't hesitate to die in place of a friend' etc. It's fine if your OC has these beliefs/values, but if they constantly say them out loud/preach them to others, then we have a problem.
[X] They have a mental disorder (Chronic Depression)
[] They have an emotional disorder
[] They struggle to stay sane
[x] They are a psycho
[] They have multiple personalities
[x] They are very intelligent
[] They have hallucinations
[x] They can summon spirits/demons/angels etc.
[] They have an unusual/unrealistic pet
[] They have a guardian spirit
[] They have a 'special type' of soul
[x] Their soul is not the same as them
[x] They can talk to spirits/ghosts
[x] Some part of their body glows
[x] They have a rare/unusual name
[] They were born on an important date, such as New Year's Eve, Midsummer's Night, The Winter Solstice etc. (Okay that's bullshit as well? Mary Sue creators don't even give their ocs a birthdate, Plus okay my mom, my dad, and sister are Marysues!)
[] They have a twin/sibling that they were separated from at birth
[] They are connected with a certain element
[] They are connected with a certain animal
[] They always dress like a certain 'label'
[] They look quite a bit like a character from a popular anime/manga
[] They are a race/species that is discriminated against/misunderstood (Shes the only Human oc that is in with the roleplay she is in? idk)
[] They have a certain power that is misunderstood/feared
[x] They live/lived on the streets at some point in their lives
[x] They are hiding from someone/something
[] They have a rare blood type
[] They cry blood sometimes
[x] Certain noises/smells/situations/etc make their powers activate/give them a nervous breakdown
[] They are from a different country to where they live
[] They are very mysterious/dark
[] They are very lively/happy
[x] Their mood changes a lot/very quickly
[] They are very patient
[] They are from a long line of overweight women and mental disorders
[] They have a piece of jewelry/clothing that they always wear
[] They have amnesia
[] They have some sort of permanent medical condition
[] They have a curse upon them
[] They are involved in some sort of prophecy
[] They are 'the chosen one'
[] They have insomnia
Overall Points: 24
Point Reductions
Take points off your OC's overall score if they fit any of the following statements:
[x] They smoke
[x] They are an alcoholic
[] They are overweight
[] They are addicted to drugs
[] They have a short temper
[] They enjoy bullying others
[x] They do not care much about others
[x] They are emotionless in some forms
Final: 20
less than 5 -Anti-Sue
Your character may be a bit on the boring side. Of course, this does depend, but generally if they are scoring that low, it wouldn't hurt to 'spice them up' a bit
6-15 -Balanced Character
If your OC scored around here, then they are probably quite a well-balanced and interesting character. Those scoring in the higher end of this category may be a bit too much though.
16-25 -Borderline Mary-Sue
We have a problem. You need to tone your character down. They are most likely a bit annoying to others, too.
25+ -Mary-Sue
Do I really need to explain anything here?
((well then nill))
[x] They are possessed by a demon
[] They are a werewolf/vampire/faerie
[] They are physically strong
[] They have a rare hair/fur colour
[x] Their eyes are an unusual colour
[x] This happens to be red
[] Their eye change colour
[] They have wings
[] They can grow extra body parts/shapeshift
[] They are immortal
[] (if a female) they have large bra size (Okay so any C cup and Up are Marysues everyone!!!)
[] (if a male) they are very muscular
[/] They are very attractive to the opposite gender
[] They are telekinetic/pyrokinetic/etc
[x] They have sixth sense/can mind-read/etc
[] They have an object of some sort that gives them powers
[] They have a special ability/power, but they don't know about it yet
[] They were bestowed/cursed with these powers
[] They are a healer
[x] They are from a very rich/royal family
[] They don't know that they are from a very rich/royal background
[x] They have lost one/both of their parents (ANYONE WHO HAS A DEAD PARENT IS A MARYSUE EVERYONE) ((his brother killed their parents oopsies))
[] They ran away from home
[] Their parents are cruel, uncaring, abusive etc
[x] They are part angel/demon/faerie/some other mythical creature
[] They never knew their parents
[] They were abused/spoiled as a child
[] They are very attractive to the same gender
[]They have lots of friends/no friends
[] They are emo or cutesy
[] They look much younger or older than they really are.
[?] They are currently in a relationship
[] They have lots of morals and state them a lot, for example: 'I would rather be with my friends than with my boyfriend/girlfriend' 'Nothing matters more to me than my friends/family' 'I wouldn't hesitate to die in place of a friend' etc. It's fine if your OC has these beliefs/values, but if they constantly say them out loud/preach them to others, then we have a problem.
[X] They have a mental disorder (Chronic Depression)
[] They have an emotional disorder
[] They struggle to stay sane
[x] They are a psycho
[] They have multiple personalities
[x] They are very intelligent
[] They have hallucinations
[x] They can summon spirits/demons/angels etc.
[] They have an unusual/unrealistic pet
[] They have a guardian spirit
[] They have a 'special type' of soul
[x] Their soul is not the same as them
[x] They can talk to spirits/ghosts
[x] Some part of their body glows
[x] They have a rare/unusual name
[] They were born on an important date, such as New Year's Eve, Midsummer's Night, The Winter Solstice etc. (Okay that's bullshit as well? Mary Sue creators don't even give their ocs a birthdate, Plus okay my mom, my dad, and sister are Marysues!)
[] They have a twin/sibling that they were separated from at birth
[] They are connected with a certain element
[] They are connected with a certain animal
[] They always dress like a certain 'label'
[] They look quite a bit like a character from a popular anime/manga
[] They are a race/species that is discriminated against/misunderstood (Shes the only Human oc that is in with the roleplay she is in? idk)
[] They have a certain power that is misunderstood/feared
[x] They live/lived on the streets at some point in their lives
[x] They are hiding from someone/something
[] They have a rare blood type
[] They cry blood sometimes
[x] Certain noises/smells/situations/etc make their powers activate/give them a nervous breakdown
[] They are from a different country to where they live
[] They are very mysterious/dark
[] They are very lively/happy
[x] Their mood changes a lot/very quickly
[] They are very patient
[] They are from a long line of overweight women and mental disorders
[] They have a piece of jewelry/clothing that they always wear
[] They have amnesia
[] They have some sort of permanent medical condition
[] They have a curse upon them
[] They are involved in some sort of prophecy
[] They are 'the chosen one'
[] They have insomnia
Overall Points: 24
Point Reductions
Take points off your OC's overall score if they fit any of the following statements:
[x] They smoke
[x] They are an alcoholic
[] They are overweight
[] They are addicted to drugs
[] They have a short temper
[] They enjoy bullying others
[x] They do not care much about others
[x] They are emotionless in some forms
Final: 20
less than 5 -Anti-Sue
Your character may be a bit on the boring side. Of course, this does depend, but generally if they are scoring that low, it wouldn't hurt to 'spice them up' a bit
6-15 -Balanced Character
If your OC scored around here, then they are probably quite a well-balanced and interesting character. Those scoring in the higher end of this category may be a bit too much though.
16-25 -Borderline Mary-Sue
We have a problem. You need to tone your character down. They are most likely a bit annoying to others, too.
25+ -Mary-Sue
Do I really need to explain anything here?
((well then nill))
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